Einstein famously said, “If I had an hour to solve a problem, I’d spend 55 minutes thinking about the problem and five minutes thinking about solutions.” That mindset is just as essential in leadership.
Many leaders come to coaching already convinced they know what their issue is. “I just need help delegating,” they’ll say. And yes, there are countless books, videos, and courses that teach delegation skills. But too often, those tools fall flat—not because the skills aren’t valid, but because the leader hasn’t taken time to understand why they struggle to delegate in the first place.
Skill-building only works when it’s paired with self-awareness.
Underneath the surface of what looks like a practical challenge often lie unspoken beliefs that shape a leader’s behavior. When those hidden assumptions go unexamined, even the best delegation frameworks won’t stick.
Here are a few examples of the kinds of assumptions that quietly drive resistance to delegation:
- “No one can do the job as well as I can.”
- “If anything goes wrong, I’ll be blamed and look incompetent.”
- “Delegating feels like dumping. I don’t want people to resent me.”
These aren’t just ideas—they’re narratives. And they often have deeper roots.
What’s really going on beneath the surface?
Let’s take a look.
“No one can do the job as well as I can.”
Coach: “What would it mean if someone could do the job just as well—or better—than you?”
Client: “Then… they wouldn’t need me.”
This isn’t about ability. It’s about identity and value.
“If anything goes wrong, I’ll be blamed and look stupid.”
Coach: “And what’s the worst part of looking stupid?”
Client: “People won’t respect me. I’ll feel like I failed.”
Here, we’re not just talking about mistakes. We’re talking about fear, shame, and self-worth.
“Delegating feels like dumping, and I don’t want people to resent me.”
Coach: “What makes you think they’d see it that way?”
Client: “Because that’s how I feel when my boss dumps work on me.”
Coach: “And what would it mean if your team resented you?”
Client: “That they don’t like me.”
Coach: “And if they don’t like you?”
Client: “Then I have no worth.”
These are deeply personal stories, often formed early in life or reinforced by past workplace experiences. And unless they’re explored and challenged, they’ll continue to sabotage even the best intentions.
The takeaway?
Before jumping into a course or workshop, strong leaders pause and ask deeper questions. They’re willing to challenge their own thinking. And they understand that real growth often begins not with a how-to, but with a willingness to look inward.
As the French philosopher Decouvertes wrote:
“It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.”
Leadership is not just about learning the right skills. It’s about becoming the kind of person who can use those skills wisely.
This idea is just the beginning.
In the coming weeks, I’ll be launching a new blog series, Leadership Blind Spots, exploring the unseen obstacles that quietly undermine even the most capable leaders.
New topics will be released twice a month—each one an invitation to reflect, grow, and lead more powerfully from the inside out.
Stay tuned.
